he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize
