I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
