her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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