I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize