I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
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