summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize