HIV tests are more positive than that guy
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
