someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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