Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
