sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize