I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
