so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
third nipple confirmed
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
