so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize