that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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