I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
