I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize