Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
