Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
