dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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