So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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