I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
he thought i was a dude.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize