Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
