I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize