i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
