it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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