why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
