check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize