do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
