Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
