Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
