Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
