god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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