I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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