Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
