I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
My Sexting was not on an AP level
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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