I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Randomize
