She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
