I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
