Sponge bath it is.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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