i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
