i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize