Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize