I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
