I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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