Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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