R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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