i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
