Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
