i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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