i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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